Your bum is better than Venus’s arse
I dwell upon it constantly
Two rounded hillocks of real class
Make other beauties sigh “Alas
Would I could see that arse on me!”
You search the Mendips and South Downs
For similar swelling curvature
But likely candidates bring frowns
Her hippy bottom’s beauty crowns
All worldwide bums and must endure.
As perfect as an air from Tosca
Her arse wins the Bottoms Oscar