I’m not good but I’m lucky that’s the truth
First, being wed to fragrant Allie King
Then dad to Cassie D and Anna Ruth
A douze de l’Avenue de Mafeking
Witty and part-bilingual though I am
I’m also ancient as the fuckin’ hills
But Allie (‘specially when she’s had a dram
Or two of vodka) pours out endless thrills
To ageing rocker-hubbie ‘cos she’s kind
And loves old people and I’m quite antique
Sweet lips, tremendous eyes are what I find
When Allie kisses, her old flame and freak
“Oh boy, oh boy” I cry through Stonehenge teeth
Though I’ve got crutches there’s a fire beneath.